her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
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