i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
