I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
