On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
