Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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