I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize