Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
