Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
