I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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