already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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