im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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