Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
