For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I want to make a zoo with you.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
