sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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