FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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