I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
