just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
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