Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I'm always down for nudity.
So apparently I’m into choking now
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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