So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
