hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
