There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize