is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Are we still banned from the library?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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