Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
