Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
