She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
