why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize