sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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