i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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