The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
