Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
People in love make me want to vomit
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
