You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
