I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I am naked and annoyed.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
