I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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