I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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