I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
