I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
