hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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