hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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