I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I need water and some morals
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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