i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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