there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
