This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize