Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Randomize
