I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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