Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize