Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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