I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
