Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
