New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
