Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
