TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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