brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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