omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
