she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
My penis needs a shock collar
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize